The phone rang while I was watching tv. Apparently my dad had a stroke. I can't decide whether to dance a jig of joy or just keep watching Dodgeball.
I don't usually hold grudges, but in his case, forgiveness is something I cannot do. People keep telling me, let go of your anger. Well, ahem, put yourself in my shoes.
Let's say YOUR DAD
had an affair with a family friend that was always over at the house. Then let's say - said mistress and YOUR DAD
stole your whole family's life savings leaving both sets of grandparents - his own parents and his in-laws, on the brink of homelessness.
What if YOUR DAD
pitted all your family members against each other, through a series of lies and blame, causing years of misunderstanding and grief? And what if YOUR DAD
had the government take money from your mom's paycheck to pay for over $350,000 of penalties that HE accrued for digging out on his taxes? Then what if YOUR DAD
left you homeless when a man came and repossed your house one day?
What if YOUR DAD
stole money from a famous celebrity? What if this crime was so infamous that someone actually wrote a book about YOUR DAD
What if the last time you talked to YOUR DAD
he laughed at you for being angry, since "he did nothing wrong." And what if YOUR DAD
didn't contact you for over 15 years and you only heard about his stroke because someone else happened to pass on the news?
Well, he's not your dad, he's mine, and he actually did all of those things. So would you forgive him if it was YOUR DAD
? Probably, but you're a better person than me. Believe it or not I'm no longer angry. I actually just feel...nothing. Apparently the stroke was mild and he will recover, but I am setting aside a nice bright pink dress to wear for his funeral just in case. I'll be waiting, not angrily, not bitterly, just...waiting.