Wednesday, January 04, 2006

"Let's get some f*ckin' french toast!"

That stork that dropped these kids off? I'd like to kick his ass. Perhaps it's post partum depression. Or the fact that I have the mother of all backaches. Or that I slammed my finger so hard today, that I no longer have feeling in it. (It was the middle finger, insert your own joke here.)

Whatever it is, I feel like crap. Just awful. My friend warned me that going from one kid to two would be hard, but seriously, I have help and I am still struggling. This is ridiculous. There are times when I feel like I can totally handle it, and then times (like now) when I don't think I was supposed to be a mother. Really. I am insanely impatient and have no tolerance for noise. I love my kids, but I'm just not good at it.

Sometimes I'd like to just run away and start a new life. This is not an option. Maybe I should just shut down this blog and start a new one under an assumed name and 'pretend' I have a different life.

I'm sure all this venting is just because the baby decided that he and I only needed 1/2 hour of sleep last night. So it was me and the baby watching '40 Year Old Virgin'. I don't think he got half the jokes, cause he wasn't laughing.


Blogger Nanette said...

Don't shut down your blog! We're not the ones keeping ya up at night with our crying. Oh, wait, actually, we do!

And are you sure the baby didn't even chuckle during the waxing scene? That was freakin' hilarious!

((((((justJENN))))) <--hugs for you

Wednesday, January 04, 2006 11:18:00 PM  
Blogger Jen14221 said...

Why don't you just point your fingers and get ready to do the twist?

Thursday, January 05, 2006 9:52:00 AM  
Blogger anne said...

"Do you know how I know you're gay? Because you like Coldplay."

Times like these is when you call in for backup and spend a "me" day at the mall, or getting your nails done, or (my favorite) a girl's lunch out. Then you'll feel guilty about leaving the kids behind and go home and give them hugs and kisses.

Thursday, January 05, 2006 10:38:00 AM  
Anonymous c.beans said...

Guess yesterday was a bad time to call you on your cell.

:( oh man - I'm not a mother so I can't really say anything to console you. But I know one thing's for sure - you ain't no bad mother cuz I KNOW bad mothers! And you ain't one of them woman.

Your kids are so lucky because of that you get a free pass for those days when the luck has run out.

Anyway - sorry it's been a rough lately. Hope it starts to look up today...

Thursday, January 05, 2006 10:45:00 AM  
Blogger Jay said...

You're supposed to have crappy days now and then, just don't let them ever, ever think that you aren't a good mother.

Thursday, January 05, 2006 10:55:00 AM  
Blogger Uccellina said...

It's hard to have kids. But you don't have to be perfect all the time, and you're allowed to be in a lousy mood sometimes.

I've never met you, but I keep up with your blog regularly because I like the things you do and the way you write about the things you do. I'd miss you if you went away.

Thursday, January 05, 2006 11:18:00 AM  
Anonymous myra said...

Yah, start another blog under an assumed name and pretend you have a different life. Maybe about a girl who leaves Laguna and heads to the big city for a job in the fashion industry?

Thursday, January 05, 2006 11:30:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

"Or that I slammed my finger so hard today, that I no longer have feeling in it. (It was the middle finger, insert your own joke here.)"

Well....the good news is you can now insert whatever you want to wherever you want to:D. You couldn't do that for a while.

Thursday, January 05, 2006 2:07:00 PM  
Blogger Jodi said...

A friend of mine with two little ones sometimes locks herself in the bathroom when they are both screaming so she can breathe.

Good luck! I'm not a mom either, so I can't really give you advice. I bet you are a good mom though. Hang in there.

Thursday, January 05, 2006 8:22:00 PM  
Blogger Leslie said...

Jenn - -
Hang in there. . . I know the roller coaster of emotions one can experience when it comes to raising kids. It's unrelenting!!! Remember that you're not alone in this! Moms support moms no matter what!

Make sure to give yourself time to be you sans the babies. That is so necessary!!! Heck, drop the kids off here, and you and I can sneak a cup of coffee or something. We'll have Hank watch the kidlets!

Thursday, January 05, 2006 9:29:00 PM  
Blogger Giao said...

Oh Jenn, I am so sorry you're having one of those stretches of rough. Although I can't commiserate on mom stories because I can't seem to successfully build a baby (damn my stork), I can relate with having those days that make you want to chuck it all in for a fantasy life.

But that's no fun. Other people's fantasies are surely not that interesting (I remember Fantasy Island. Snorefest). So, keep on keeping on. You're a rockstar and get so much more done with your 2 kids in tow than I do with none.

Friday, January 06, 2006 9:16:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I love when I see posts like this. Not because I'm glad someone is going through a hard time. But because now other moms will know they aren't bad parents just because they feel like this sometimes. When I had my daughter I felt very isolated. The only friend of mine with kids was always dressed to the nines, not a hair out of place, make up perfect, driving her perfect car, living in her perfectly spotless house, raising her perfectly behaved and well dressed kids. I thought I was the only one that felt exhausted and was wondering how the hell I was going to do this parent thing. My daughter is a healthy, happy teenager now. Guess even through exhaustion and keeping a messy house, I did something right.

Friday, January 13, 2006 7:32:00 AM  

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