Tuesday, February 21, 2006

Everybody comes to Hollywood
They wanna make it in the neighborhood

Here is the deal with Hollywood. It's a shithole. No, really. When I was younger, it was beat up, run down, a real craphole. Still I went out there almost every week for the record stores and great concerts you couldn't see anywhere else. Now they've 'revamped' it, all fanci-fied with Hollywood and Highland bringing in even more tourists than before. The thing is...it still feels, well, shitty.

I have been to Hollywood and Highland many times, just not with the kids. This time we went and took the Kid to the new Beard Papa's Cafe. The word 'cafe' is pushing it, seeing as how there's about 3 chairs out on a very tiny deck. However the cream puffs didn't disappoint, and if you care, no, the Kid has not gained a single pound despite massive cream puff eating.

But I guess since I was toting the kids this time, I really felt...protective. There are these 'characters' that are out on Hollywood Boulevard, dressed in costume, and the tourists all take pictures with them. What the tourists don't realize is, these aren't people paid by the city, they are just people trying to make a buck, and no lady, your picture with that guy in the faded yellowed Storm Trooper outfit ain't free. As witnessed when I saw some tourist took a picture with Mr. Incredible, and she, looking happy as a lark, was stunned when Mr. Incredible said through his mask, "So, uh, where's my tip lady?" NICE. Disney would be proud.

They are trying to crack down on these hacks. Not only does it look bad, but I heard one tried to knife another. I'm telling you, nothing is more pathetic than a man in an ill-fitting Bart Simpson mask, standing next to a Homer Simpson counting dollar bills.
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9 Comments:

Blogger Lady Librarian said...

We have the same thing in Leicester Square here in London, usually some person sprayed all gold or all silver standing still, and the tourists love it, then pay to have their picture taken with them. Working in Leicister Square once (not as a painted person) a friend got talking to one of these people, and on a good day they can make over £1,000 a day. A day!!

Tuesday, February 21, 2006 1:30:00 AM  
Blogger Jodi said...

The shittiness of Hollywood is part of its "charm." Or, so I tell myself. I'm also not out with kids that I need to protect, which really makes any of that "charm" disappear I'm sure.

Tuesday, February 21, 2006 2:28:00 AM  
Anonymous David said...

As always, I come too late. I've been to Hollywood just once, last November, for about half an hour on a rainy day, as part of a half day bus tour of Los Angeles which is all I had time for at the end of a business trip. I saw the Hollywood sign from Mulholland Drive for about two seconds before it disappered behind the clouds. I'm not sure about the scroungers on Hollywood Boulevard, but I feel robbed. Better luck next time, but I'll keep stopping by your blog for more useful advice.

Tuesday, February 21, 2006 6:55:00 AM  
Blogger justJENN said...

I agree. I used to think the shittiness was part of the charm. Things change I guess.

Try explaining to your kid why he shouldn't touch the dirty and dishevelled Elmo.

Tuesday, February 21, 2006 7:59:00 AM  
Blogger ren said...

yeah, i used to love hollywood and it's dirty, dirty charm but it's the invasion of the chain stores that i really don't need. and i think "honey, elmo has a hangover, just like mommy" pretty much sums it up...well, it would for me anyway.

Tuesday, February 21, 2006 11:13:00 AM  
Blogger Chris said...

I've been to Hollywood once, for a few hours and...

It was about exactly what I expected.

I enjoyed my short trip and I would like to go back and see a bit more (I felt a bit rushed doing the "all of LA in one day" thing while on a business trip). I think these comments summed it up pretty well - you want the old stores, theaters, and restaurants for a bit of seedy charm, but you also want to feel safe and, dare I say, entertained while you are there.

Since I wasn't there with kids, didn't pose with the "characters", and weren't harassed by any of them, I thought they made the street a bit surreal.

Tuesday, February 21, 2006 11:28:00 AM  
Blogger Will said...

Living just down the street from Hollywood & Highland I try to avoid it whenever possible. So far in the past two years I've been twice.

Tuesday, February 21, 2006 4:08:00 PM  
Anonymous kat said...

Being comfortable in my hick skin - I've never had the desire to see Hollywood or Time's Square. Or Disney land or world. Thank you for remindignme why:).

Sunday, February 26, 2006 7:36:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hollywood is a toilet. It may be cold and boring where I am from in the Midwest but at least the people aren't complete moral-less pieces of shit.

Friday, March 01, 2013 6:38:00 PM  

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