Tuesday, April 24, 2007

PC LOAD LETTER? What the f*ck does that mean?

I have a laptop, an iPod, two cell phones, I taught myself html and I can do autocad like a motherf*cker. What I can't do is figure out how to do stuff in the office. I am the worst.

First of all, I took two years off to have kids and when I came back there are these 'wite out tapes'. Where are the bottles with the brushes like I had in 6th grade?? I am old skool like that. I do not understand your futuristic white out pens.

Worse are the machines. Oh lord, forget it. The copier, the fax, the fax/copier, I become Unfrozen Caveman Lawyer, I just don't get it. I usually make the assistant do these menial tasks, not because I am better than that, but because it would take me hours to figure out.

I felt bad, and I got tired of bugging her with little things. So today I attempted...the electric hole punch. What the F with the electric? Why can't we just have the one you use with your hands? I am crafty like that. So I took the papers, put it in, and voila!** It worked! The assistant came by and saw me standing there. She yelled, "OH MY GOD JENN. What are you doing??" She was shocked but mostly disappointed. I'd often bake her cookies or make her cards because I felt so bad giving her crap work. Now I can do the crap work myself! And she gets no cookies. Sad. Poor her. So, call me if you want me to punch anything. That includes people in the face.

**Ok, I didn't do it myself. I stood there and stared at it and pushed some random buttons until someone came walking by and helped me. I know. Pathetic.

5 Comments:

Anonymous Jenifer said...

I know how you feel. Me and the copier at work, we're not friends. We tolerate each other. This is the first copier that I haven't been able to figure out. I believe the engineer that designed the tray to the load the paper is related to Satan.

Tuesday, April 24, 2007 7:56:00 PM  
Blogger Jodi said...

Well, my "office" is cheap, so we have brush-on white out and manual hole punchers. But yeah, the copier/fax/whatever machine is a bit overwhelming and it always breaks down. Grrr.

Tuesday, April 24, 2007 9:32:00 PM  
Anonymous poppy said...

How's about that mimeograph with the purple ink that stained your hands for days?! Okay, I just dated myself. Or it could be that as a teacher, I've worked in some majorly underfunded public schools.

Tuesday, April 24, 2007 11:57:00 PM  
Anonymous Melina said...

Office Space-that scene is BEST!

I do own a Swingline red stapler too...

Thursday, April 26, 2007 9:38:00 AM  
Anonymous kat said...

Hey, you can NOT knock mimeographs! I find it tragic there's a whole generation of kids that don't get the scene in Fast Times when everyone simultaneously inhaled their copies.

That smell should be a yankee candle.

I'm sorry, Jim just impersonated Dwight....

Thursday, April 26, 2007 5:33:00 PM  

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