Friday, November 30, 2007

We all know that people are the same where ever we go
There is good and bad in everyone,

Every year I subscribe to "12 Days of Cookies" or whatever it's called and it's always a disappointment. I look at the cookies they chose and I'm like, BLERGH. Last year Nanette and I had a fantastic cookie exchange with a bunch of baker friends - unfortunately this year there's just no time. December is a sneaky bastard. Seems all of our days are booked up already.

If I were to do it this year I think I'd bring my favorite, the good ol' Black and White cookie. God I love those, and they last me a while cause they are usually bigger than my head. And I have a big ass head.That's why I like to make mini ones. Anything mini is fan-freakin-tastic. These are no exception. I made a bunch of these for the Best Shower Ever, in pink, and the recipe has never failed me or my tastebuds. Mini Black and White cookie recipe, here.

While I'm sad that there's no cookie exchange, I still love to hear about other people's fave eats. So, like a virtual cookie exchange - what is a cookie that is your standby tried and true recipe? Or if you don't bake, what is your favorite cookie? Man I'm hungry for cookies now...

Labels: , ,

The winner!!

Congrats! Email me and you will get your package of free stuff in no time!


Merry freakin' Christmas

The show started off slow, but when I tallied everything up at the end of the night it ended up being pretty successful, which is nice.

Is it just me or does it seem like no one's in the Christmas mood? It's right around the corner, yet people seem indifferent. Shopping wise especially. Most of the stuff I sold - people bought for themselves, not others. Maybe people are just being selfish this year, HA.

I need to get the 'mood' goin' around here. The kids have been asking for a tree, but with all this rain I'm not about to drag a wet sappy tree into the house. However, I am going to kick it up a notch this weekend and decorate the house, bake cookies and wrap presents. There's going to be Christmas spirit all up in this mother if it kills me.

Labels: ,

Thursday, November 29, 2007

Make it work.

The winner will be announced tomorrow. Right now, I'm beat.

The craft boutique was pretty successful. I'm kinda surprised. Lots of people came to visit and buy things, and I am very thankful. But for now I'm going to go watch my tivo'd Project Runway and try and scrape together something to eat. Cause while I love me some olive tapenade, spoonfuls of it every 2 hours while selling stuff, is not a dinner.


Wednesday, November 28, 2007


For those of you who said you come here for the tales of woe...

I hate when my phone rings. That can only mean trouble. It's always that dreaded number: "KIDS SCHOOL"and it's never 'Hey your kid has straight A's, yay you!'. Or, 'Just calling to say you are an awesome parent!' Ugh. No. It's always bad news. The other day it rang, as I reluctantly picked it up I actually winced. Is there such a thing as a phone wince?

Jenn: ", hello?"
: "We think the Baby broke his arm!"

: "SIGH."

So off I went to assess the situation. Yeah, something was wrong. I rushed him to the doctor (thank god we didn't have to go to the ER, THIS time.) Turns out he...popped his elbow out. BLLAARRGGHH! God, that is so disgusting. I have never broken anything. I doubt I ever will, as I am neither adventurous nor clumsy. This kid is only two and so his elbow is only yay big. The doctor said it had popped back in by itself (ew) which is good cause she usually has to pop it back in for them (double ew.)

To my horror, she said it's fairly normal in little kids, and that this will most likely happen again. Which only makes me think of Mel Gibson in Lethal Weapon, and that this will be some sort of parlour trick the Baby pulls out at parties.

Now I don't want to touch him. I look at him like a little doll. I don't want to swing him, or pick him up or help him up the stairs. What if his arm f*ing pulls right off like Raggedy Andy?? I.WILL.FREAK.

And now the poor little Baby - who speaks volumes lately - is going around saying, "My elbos pop out. My elbos pop out." Sick. I phone wince everytime.

*contest still open*


Tuesday, November 27, 2007

Fifty told me, go head switch the style up, and if they hate then let them hate, and watch the money pile up

I have been doing craft shows on and off for ten years. The only one I am doing this season is a boutique - this week, featuring local artists who are all designers and architects. If you are in the Los Angeles area and are interested in doing some holiday shopping, send me an email and I'll give you the details.

Or, if you want to be lazy and just get stuff for free, today is your lucky day. Win a pack of stationery items. You can keep them, or shorten your holiday list by giving them away, it's your choice. You will win a collection of all sorts of things, holiday tags, cards, it will also include a card set from my new line of Modern cards:
You can go here and buy them or if you are a lurker/cheap bastard, leave a comment. Tell me how you got here. Why do you keep coming back? For the recipes? My tales of woe? Lord knows. However if you are the one who comes here after googling "What do boobs feel like", well then, I don't want to know, really.

Winner to be chosen randomly, you have til Thursday night. Good luck!

Labels: ,

Monday, November 26, 2007

My precious

Four days wasn't enough, I took today off too. But only because I got 2.5 hours of sleep last night, so I called in cranktastic rather than sick.

Not only that, I think I might have a sty eye, and the only home remedy I can find on the net is to rub a gold ring on my eye. My name is not Frodo, I do not have a gold ring.

With my one eye I have been drawing up a new comic, watching Project Runway and doing a ton of online window shopping. The rest of my day's agenda includes eating Cool Ranch Doritos, designing my holiday cards, and oh screw it, I'm just gonna nap.

The Kid asked for one thing today, and that is - he wants salmon for dinner. I can easily oblige, as this recipe is quick and simple. I don't recommend making it with one eye, though.

Teriyaki Salmon recipe, HERE.

Labels: , ,

Sunday, November 25, 2007

Remain seated please.
Permanecer sentados, por favor.

Today we went to Disneyland to celebrate the Baby's birthday. Usually when we go there we spend three hours, I get cranky, and we go home. This time we met up with friends who flew in to town, so we made the most of it. Meaning, we left the house at 8am, and got back near midnight. With four toddlers total - whew - what a day.

One thing about my kids, they HATE characters. Good lord. From afar, no biggie, but one step towards them and it's like a screamfest. My friend's kids loved them, but the Baby looked like he was going to kick someone's ass if they didn't get away from him. Every two seconds he'd turn around to make sure no one was following him. It's depressing to see the characters cover their 'fake' ears and run FROM my children.

Since we go almost every week, the Kid had fun showing the other kids around our second home. It was a perfect day. The park was dripping in holiday flava, and the kids were as happy as can be. However this may be a reason to be scared too - imagine turning around and seeing a giant mouse in a holiday sweater, riding a horse. Hello nightmares.

Labels: , ,

Thursday, November 22, 2007

Kinda buzzin', loose off the Goose,
Got 'em on the chase like cranberry juice

Our Thanksgiving starts at noon and goes til about 9. That's 9 full hours of eating, folks. Instead of our regular brine, we went with the Chez Panisse/Alice Waters recipe. Must remember to use this again. Holy crap, it was fantastic. Here's recap of today, in a series of before and afters~


As you can see, gravy is crazy disgusting. Disgustingly DELICIOUS. The only one I missed was the before and after of O.G. drinking wine and being a little coo coo. Crazy drunk bastard.

Labels: , ,

Tuesday, November 20, 2007

I have only one burning desire, let me stand next to your fire

Tonight I shook the hand of one Mr. Gordon Ramsay. Yes, my Celebrity Chef stalking continues. Nanette, Jodi and I were out in the 90210 tonight. It was like a Brenda/Kelly/Donna reunion. (Not at all and if you're under 30 you won't even get that reference so let's move on.)

The Paley Center for Media, (MTR to me) was having a panel tonight showcasing Hell's Kitchen and Kitchen Nightmares. Basically a Gordon Ramsay lovefest. I have been a big fan of his BBC Kitchen Nightmares since the beginning, so it was HUGE for me to get to hear him speak. Believe it or not, he was not an asshole. He was kind, funny and extremely charming. The man has a passion for food and it shows.
While there were many - my favorite anecdote of the night was when someone asked what his best meal in Los Angeles was. He said he loved AOC, Sona, Cut and hasn't had a bad meal in L.A. yet. His favorite though? In and Out Burgers. He said, 'you have to get it animal style, and by that I don't mean take you from behind.' Nice.

It was a great night out with the girls, yet I am convinced that now people are just inviting me out so that they have something to post for NaBloPoMo. After November 30th, I think I will be begging for dates.

Here's video of a much calmer Gordon Ramsay than we are used to, making the Perfect Scrambled Egg.

Labels: ,

Monday, November 19, 2007

Nuckin' futs.

When talking to the kids, my MIL uses the word 'peanuts' when she is referring to the word penis - as in, 'Wash your peanuts', etc. I am rolling my eyes here in case you need a play by play.

So imagine reading this bedtime story to the Baby:

And then imagine the Baby grabbing his crotch and screaming, "NO SQUIRRELS!! NO EAT MY PEANUTS!!!"


Don't even get me started on this one:


Sunday, November 18, 2007

Jack: Never go with a hippie to a second location.*

For having no plans, this somehow turned into My So-Called Hipster Weekend. On Saturday Nanette and I decided to go to the Gama Go sample sale in Los Feliz. I am a big fan of Tim Biskup, so I was excited to see what they had. See is the operative word here, as the sale was held at the Bigfoot Lounge and well, it's a bar, and there are no lights. NO LIGHTS. At one point I couldn't even find Nanette and I just wandered behind people holding their cell phones to get us out of what may have been a dank mine shaft, I have no idea.

I got a bunch of cute gifts for friends, but my fave of all was this hoodie -

- Two words, NINJA KITTY!! Orange isn't usually my color but I loved the embroidery on this thing. And since it was 75% off I was even more in love. Not so good is the fact that the supposed 'large' is snug to say the least. The fit is fine except for the boobage area. Sad.

Sunday I decided at the last minute to go to Felt Club, seeing as how Jodi was representin' at the Maker Faire. I was kind of shocked when I was walking around, at the amount of people I knew there. Internet friends, people who sell my stuff, and friends I hadn't seen in like ten years. It was crazy. Wasn't really expecting that.

All in all it was a good weekend. Now I'm off to schedule a breast reduction so that I can get into my new hoodie. Stupid boobs.

*Yes, I know hippies and hipsters are different beings, but I love that quote and I can't stop saying it.


Saturday, November 17, 2007

Three ring circus

So get this, new blog to read - My Target Cart. Yes, it chronicles purchases from the store I visit far too often. I come home with some amazing finds, then again maybe I'll just post about that new toilet paper I bought, cause it's totally rad too.

Oh, did I forget to mention...
...that I got MATCHING CUPS TOO?? I went back to Target and glanced quickly on the clearance endcap, seeing not only the beloved Circus plates, but magically, matching cups appeared too. And they are the swirly water floaty ones too! Only 50 cents, suckas. MWAHAH!

Labels: , ,

Friday, November 16, 2007

Drinking and driving

Driving in the car:

The Kid: "Did you see that? There was a pool table in there, let's go in!"
"You can't, that's a Bar."

The Kid:
"What's a bar?"

"It's where you drink."

The Kid: "I want to drink."
"You and me both."

I bought these cookies, 'for the kids'. Right. I'm a nerd.

Labels: ,

Thursday, November 15, 2007

What has 2 skinny chicken legs and sucks at ping pong?

This could be the last Office, EVAH!! That's what they're saying anyway - til the strike's over. Yes, this one was painful. However I think it's good that they are shaking things up. While the ping pong thing was a side story it made me laugh and laugh. SPIN SERVE!

It's been a rough week around here. I am deep into construction, and there is nothing more painful than getting a building built, not even birth - and I've done that twice with ease. I've had to be downtown every day before 8am. While this is easy for most people, for me it sucks. Before I even brave the freeways, I have to get the kids up, wash them up, change their clothes, make them breakfast, pack their lunch, help brush their teeth, do the dishes, get myself put together, and take them to school - only now I have to do it all in 30 minutes or less.

I sit in traffic and dream of going away on a trip. I love my kids but I just want to be alone for a few days, and not think. Where would you go if you could get away? Wherever I go, it won't involve taking the 110 fwy, I'll tell you what.

More importantly, I was lusting after Liz Lemon's purse on 30Rock tonight. Damn I love purses.

Labels: ,

Wednesday, November 14, 2007

David: Under 'Strengths'... you've just put accounts.
Keith: Yeah.
David: Under 'Weaknesses' you've put eczema..

I have to tell you, it's time to start your Christmas shopping, seriously. Stop screwing around. I'm almost done, suckas! Shop-wise, I'm up to my eyeballs with holiday goodness, filling orders and preparing for that upcoming designer's boutique. So let me help you along, spend $20 in the online store and get a set of jingle cards, free! Just sayin'. Start. Now.

I could never be an admin. I am too stupid. I can't figure office equipment out. I stand in front of the copier for hours until The Assistant comes to help me. If I can't figure out how to use something, beating it with a stapler would be my advice. The office telephone, UGH. It lives to annoy me. When clients are done talking to me and ask to be transferred to another architect, I say, "Why don't you just call them?"

One thing I am kind of ok at, that doesn't involve stupid office equipment? Cooking my kids dinner. This recipe is a winner with the kiddies, and super easy because you just toss stuff together. Like juggling. But with food. Try it. You'll like it.

Parmesan Chicken Penne recipe, HERE.

Labels: , ,

Tuesday, November 13, 2007

Look at the size of that boy's head. It's like an orange on a toothpick.

No, crazies. Those are not sheets. It's a purse bag. A bag for your purse. Stupid, I know, it's supposed to protect it, ugh, nevermind. More on that later.

So did you know that in L.A. we have Water Police? It's true. They will f*ck you up if you leave your sprinklers on, big time. Well, not really. They just 'counsel' you. I'd rather they pull guns on your while you watered your lawn. "PUT DOWN THE HOSE AND BACK AWAY SLOWLY." That'd be way more awesome than advice.

I'm just stalling. Here's what's in the box. I'd been searching for a purse, The Purse, for some time. Requirements? I wanted it BIG. This one - it's...big. Bigger than my head, and I have a huge noggin. Also it was extremely hard to pick such a bright color, because I love black so much. However, seeing as how my entire wardrobe is Sexy Funeral, I thought a bright red purse would stand out and match nicely with all my black dresses and heels. And it does - I'm glad I went out on a limb against my gut feeling.

I love Kate Spade purses because I shun the 'noisy' ones. I am also a freak about structure and her purses are clean, functional and will last for years and years. Also they will not break your back, they are so lightweight. The other detail that drew me was the 'spaghetti' bag straps, strands of straps pieced together. When I bought the bag, I was in the brand new week old Waikiki store. That is fate. They open my favorite store, WHILE I am there on vacation??

KS salesgirl: "Are you in our system?"
Jenn: "Er...uh. *sigh* Uh, I'm sure of it."
KS salesgirl: "Really, what other stores of ours do you frequent?"
Jenn: "Online. New York. Los Angeles...Vegas..."

Yikes. How embarrassing. Fate again? When I went to pay I found out that the purse was 20% off, that day only. FATE.

Labels: ,

Monday, November 12, 2007

I'm trippin', I'm caught up in the moment right? 'Cause it's Louis Vuitton Don night

I went to Beverly Hills today and it was all tricked out for Christmas already. Wow. I don't even feel it yet. More importantly, is it possible to live off of Breadbar's Olive Petit Baguettes? Lord knows I'm trying.

I finally went to the Murakami exhibit this weekend and it was fantastic. I have been a fan of his for some time and it was nice to see all of his work in one place. I suppose it was good that I left the boys at home as all the extreme nudity of Hiropon and My Lonesome Cowboy were at the front entrance. The sedate flowery stuff that Nanette and I oohhed and ahhed over, was in the back.

Process always interests me, and the show had sketches and final paintings as well. Go to the MOCA website and take a virtual tour of the exhibition. The best part is Murakami himself walks the floor and explains his pieces - he explains DOB and also explains the porno bits. Interesting. No, I did not buy the limited edition Murakami MOCA Louis Vuitton purse.

On a semi-related note, I bought myself an early Christmas/Hannukkah/Kwanzaa gift...happy holidays to me.

Labels: , ,

Saturday, November 10, 2007

Party all the time

How did the party go? Pretty good, I think. Suddenly all of my friends have kids and noise level was what I like to call, "Jenn might kill all of you", but it didn't last long, as the kids had to go home and nap. I sufficiently did my part by loading them up with sugar. Take a look:

I had to make Elmo cupcakes, c'mon! I had been planning to make these for months. I was going to use white icing to pipe the eyeballs, then I saw these and liked her idea of using a marshmallow. Elmo-licious! (Go here for the other steps.) What else did we have? A soft serve ice cream bar:
8 different kinds of ice cream including: Coffee. Chocolate. Hibiscus. Corn. Orange Blossom. Hazelnut. Hawaiian Lehua Honey and Sweet Cream. Pumpkin.
And just what did I do with that apothecary jar? Well, a Cereal bar, of course! Fruity Pebbles, Froot Loop Smoothie, Strawberry Yogurt Cherrios and Lucky Charms. With milk on ice, on the side.
This post should last me for a few days, as I am now beat. It wasn't that much work, believe it or not, I think I am just coming down from my sugar high. I think I need to detox for the rest of the weekend...

Go HERE for all party pics.

Labels: ,

Friday, November 09, 2007

Party like it's...zzzz

The Kid is well. It's a Christmas miracle! Or something.

I had a rough day at work. Came home. Cleaned the floor. Made punch. Cooked the kids dinner. Gave the Kid his meds. Made the base for the soft serve ice cream machine. Yelled at the Baby for eating play doh. Prepped my little smokies. Gave the kids dessert. Cleaned my apothecary jar. Put the Baby on time out. Dusted the house. Chopped veggies. Shaved the Kid's head. Gave him a bath. Vacuumed. Baked 19 cupcakes. Filled some orders. Scolded the Baby for punching the Kid in the head. Made frosting for tomorrow's cupcake assembly. Kissed the kids goodnight. Took a shower. Prepped the serving table. Now I think I'm ready...for sleep anyway. zzz...

Labels: ,

Tuna. Me likey the ice cream cake.

Uh oh. Looks like something's afoot at the Office. What is Jim thinking?? Is he leaving? AGAIN? I guess we'll have to wait til after the writer's strike to find out.

I gotta admit, I was a bit distracted during tonight's Office. The Kid's fever was at an all time high. It's hard being a mom when you are near helpless and your child wants you to fix them. I am determined to get him well by the Baby's bday party, so help me.

Also, my mind was swirling with thoughts of planning. What I need to buy, what I need to cook, and also, how I am going to assemble Elmo cupcakes for tomorrow. That is my number one priority tomorrow. To make those suckers work. No, wait. Boy = get well. Number one. Cupcakes = number two. He's close, I think he's gonna make it. Otherwise he'll be locked outside and just have to watch us eat ice cream through the sliding glass door. Or so I've threatened him. (insert sad violin, here)

Labels: ,

Wednesday, November 07, 2007

When you find youself in danger, when you're threatened by a stranger, when it looks like you will take a lickin'

I am gearing up for the holidays with a promotion, spend $20 get a set of 'Jingle' tags, free! I'm tellin' you, I need to hire some illegal immigrant workers to help me with this business, because my supposed in-house child labor sucks ass. All these kids want is for me to get them juice and clean their poop. What about my needs?? Let's have a little give and take here, dammit!

Because I like to keep you guessing about what my posts are about, seeing as how even I am confused at this point, let's just finish it off with a recipe. A simple one. Japanese yakitori. It sounds complicated, but it's just chicken on a stick. Easy and delicious, that's all you need to know.
Yakitori recipe, here.
Also, I bought the book, "A Recipe Writer's Handbook," but it hasn't arrived. Lame. So until then, I will continue to use the word motherf*er in my recipes. Deal with that amazon!!

Labels: ,

Tuesday, November 06, 2007

You are my heroine. And by heroine I mean lady hero. I don't want to inject you and listen to jazz.

Nothing but thoughts today. Sorry folks, move along, nothing to see here.
  • I got a new hardhat today, thank god. Cause 'borrowing' strange men's hardhats made me feel like I was going to get an std or have my hair picked at with two popsicle sticks for lice, at least.
  • Surfas boxlunches to-go are a gift from god. They fit perfectly between the driver's and passenger's side so I can eat the DELICIOUS sandwich and manage the 10 fwy while I also pick at the salad with my fingers. It's the only way to drive and eat. That should be their slogan straight from the DMV, by the way.
  • The next time the Baby tears garlic bread in two and rubs it on his head to form a greazy mohawk, I will look away and ask whose child that is.
  • I am preparing for an ice cream fest this weekend and have bought several crazy ass flavors to try - including hibiscus and CORN. There will be no bacon.
  • I gathered all the train crap that is on the 'lead based will kill you' list. Most of it was gnawed at already by the Baby, of course.

Labels: , ,

Monday, November 05, 2007

She's crafty - she's always down

This weekend I had a date. With Tom Colicchio. Well, not really. But a friend and I went to Craft for dinner. The new hotspot for celebrities and agents, and owned by Tom Colicchio of Top Chef fame.

This meal did not disappoint. Some highlights include, Peekytoe Crab & Sweet Corn Gratin, (peekytoe-hee!) , Hen of Woods mushrooom, and White Sweet Potato & Marshmallow, yes, we just eat sides, that's how we are. Each dish was pretty much cooked to perfection with the most amazing taste combinations.

We ordered a few other things but also we, uh...ordered three desserts. This is how we eat. Don't come out with us if you can't keep up with the sugar level. I have to say I was disappointed with the desserts. I expected more 'sweet', or something. Prior to going there I had heard about the Maple Bacon Ice Cream but when we got it, I couldn't handle it. Chewing large chunks of bacon in a creamy ice cream was too blech. It is rare that I would waste dessert, but I pretty much left all three on the plates. Sad.

The meal was really spectacular. I was impressed. Especially with the service. The waiters are extremely knowledgeable and know how every dish is prepared and tastes. Also, throughout the meal they brought us so many free 'extras'. A taste of an appetizer, a taste of of a special dessert not on the menu, and at the end:
This is called a mignardise. Ours was a tiny piece of toffee and...HOLD ON...itty bitty macarons. Good lord. If you ever want to buy my love, just give me a macaron and I am yours. Especially an itty bitty one. While I am not a fan of taking pictures of your food at restaurants myself, I was fine with my friend taking pictures of every plate, cause hell, she has a food blog. Also, I happily posed for the above photo because TINY. SO. CUTE.

Hold on. One more thing, right before we left, the waiter, who again, I must mention, was excellent, gave us a little take home pumpkin spice muffin for the road. Again - FREE. Very nice, very special - the entire meal was amazing. Good company helps as well, whenever I go to a fine dining restaurant (rarely) I like to go with people who enjoy the food and experience as much as me. We like to pick apart the meal and analyze the ingredients and different tastes. It makes the whole dining experience that much better. I'd go back, but get dessert somewhere else. Or my bacon somewhere else.

Labels: , ,

Sunday, November 04, 2007

Did I stutter?

This must be a sign that I should not shop this week, because twice so far, I've had bad retail experiences.

If I had a million dollars I'd buy tons of useless crap at Crate and Barrel. I just love that store. So I saw this gorgeous apothecary jar in the catalog, and I headed down to the store to get it.

There was a cashier standing alone...when all the other ones had looong lines. First clue right there. I asked her where the apothecary jar was, I even showed her a picture. She stared at me, then returned with a 2" tall spice jar. Er. No. I said, "I wanted the apothecary jar." She replied, "Oh, right here." How did she all of a sudden know what I meant in just 5 seconds? She said, "Some people use different terminology."

Ok, fine. She doesn't like my terminology, no prob. I decide to go for the bonus round. "Do you have any scoops?" Her answer: "Scoops? What are those?" At this point even I was stumped. What do I say? " SCOOP things with them? Flour, candy, stuff like that?" Here's where the genius spills out of my mouth and even I start to wonder what I am asking for: "It's like a spoon...but not?" UGH. I was over it. She huffed and again said, "WELL. Everyone uses different terminology." Good lord it's like she learned a new word and couldn't wait to use it or something.

As I've stated many times from all my years of working retail, having someone who knows what they are actually selling REALLY HELPS. I ended up going to Surfas and getting scoops for a mere $1.36 thank you very much. Screw you non-spoon/scoop-lady. Nevertheless, I am VERY happy with my apothecary jar. It's gorgeous, and just WAIT til you see what I do with it this weekend...

Labels: ,

Saturday, November 03, 2007

Krush groovin', body movin'

I am organized. When I go to the market I place my heavy items together, my frozen items together, my veggies together, all to make check out easy for me and for the bagger. Therefore, would you be mad if the TJ's clerk bagged your groceries as such:

4 lbs of frozen chicken on top of a bag of potato chips. Gallon of milk on top of tortillas. And in my last bag, the kicker, 2 cans of kidney beans, 2 cans of mandarin oranges, 2 large cans of diced tomatoes...ON TOP of a carton of eggs.


Not to be a bitch, but when I got home I called the manager. He said the guy was 'new' but I don't think you need to work in a grocery store to figure out that makes NO SENSE. Now I have f*ed up eggs and potato chips.


Friday, November 02, 2007

I'm hot, sticky sweet, from my head to my feet

I didn't get to go to New York this winter so I made up for it by shipping myself some Fat Witch brownies, aka the greatest brownies, ever. When you walk into the bakery it smells like pure chocolatey heaven. While they taste best straight from the oven, these will do. O.G. will be happy, as it is the only thing she ever asks me to buy her.On theme with my self-induced diabetic coma, I ate a ton of the kid's Halloween candies. Is it just me or are the Snickers 'fun size' bars smaller now? Or am I just a giant? A fat giant, sure, but they seem skinnier. What's up with the chincy candy, people?? I feel like BJ Novak and the mystery of the Cadbury Egg...

Labels: , ,

Thursday, November 01, 2007

Wanted: Middle aged black man with sass. Big butt. Bigger heart.

Oh god. Is there anything better than fake moustaches? Probably, yes. Tonight's Office was so stupid it was funny. I thought the 'Finer Things Club' was kind of lame-dash-oh and I am not a fan of Karen, however I am a fan of watching Dwight attempt to pee in a car. This was a Joss Whedon directed episode, yet, no bats this time.

It is so weird that Maria wrote about me today because I specifically had this post about plates lined up for the day AFTER Halloween. Why the day after, you ask? Because I had seen these cute Halloween plates a few weeks ago, and since I am a cheap bastard, I knew if I went into Target today the plates would be 50%.

I have a thing for divided plates. They seem so cute - then again maybe it's all the time the Kid and I spend at hospitals, who knows.

AND I got these cute circus ones (just on regular old clearance) for $1.42. Awesome.

Really how many goddam plates do I need, but they were so cheap and cute! Is there such a thing as cute plate addiction? My excuse is that I can fill each little compartment with fruits and veggies thus giving the kids a well balanced meal. I try to teach them things like the four basic food groups, and the fact that the eyes are the groin of the head. You know, the important things.

Labels: , ,