Thursday, December 11, 2008

Learn to love me. Assemble the ways.
Now, today, tomorrow and always.

Going to the market lately has become a task. A big overwhelming daunting task. Especially when the kids come with me. AND especially now that it's 'The Season'. That's what the cashier at Trader Joe's called it when I went there and every single checkout was 10 people deep. It prompted me to just yell out loud exasperated-like, right there in the cornichon aisle, 'WHAT THE HELL!?'

As you may or may not know, wrangling two kids out of car seats, into jackets, across a busy parking lot, while one (the Baby) tries to run away and yells "YOU'LL NEVAH TAKE ME ALIVE!!!!", and then into an even busier store - is not easy. So once I'm inside...there's no turning back. We HAVE to stay put.

Instead of racing around, I saunter up and down the aisles. Slowly. In hopes that the crowds will die down and then I can checkout with ease. I pass the organic fruits. Stop and smell the cheeses. Take the kids to the 'free sample' counter. But no. My plan does not work. Instead the lines get LONGER. And the 'free samples' consist of Carrot Juice and lemongrass eggrolls that both (according to the Kid) 'Taste deescuzting."Suddenly he's French.

So what is the outcome of all of this? More crap in my cart that I probably wouldn't have picked up in the first place. This could become a series, I pick up so much junk that I wouldn't have otherwise. After the wonderful life changing chocolate croissant that I got last time, when I spied these MINI Pecan Pies, I almost melted right there in the freezer section. You had me at mini. Let's get married.I had been hankering for pecan pie but did NOT want to make it. I get lazy around the holidays. I cook so much all year I figure it's the holidays when other people who don't normally cook can really get it on. Not me. So I took the pies home. "Just defrost," it said. Are you kidding me? Much like with the croissant, I was skeptical. But once again, it was MAGICAL. Delicious. The perfect ratio of filling to crust. WOW. Fabulous.

In the end I finally did make it out of the store. The kids said, "Can we have stickers?" The cashier said, "What's the magic word?" By that point I wanted to say, "The magic word is f*ck off." I was completely over this horrible shopping experience already. But the kids, who are better than their mother, said, "PLEASE." And they got their stickers.

As we exited, the Baby took off screaming, "YOU'LL NEVAH TAKE ME ALIVE!"...again. Yeah, yeah. We heard you coming in.

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9 Comments:

Blogger Julie said...

Hi Jenn,

Sorry to bug you with questions...but do you have recipes for your ginger bread and royal icing posted anywhere? Thanks ~Julie in freezing cold Massachusetts

Thursday, December 11, 2008 6:45:00 AM  
Blogger justJENN said...

Hi Julie, send me an email and I'll send them to you.

Thursday, December 11, 2008 6:51:00 AM  
Blogger Sizzle said...

The magic word is fuck. Ha! It usually is. ;-)

My TJs did not have chocolate croissants, only plain.

Sob.

Thursday, December 11, 2008 7:07:00 AM  
Blogger lilsprinkles said...

Here's the secret to the TJ's madness...you go at 8:58am and wait at the door with all the other vultures! They serve breakfast stuff AND coffee at the sample counter and most likely you'll be able to get out in 30 minutes! I NEVER go in the evening or weekends...I just make my kids drink watered down milk :) (I'm kidding, btw)

Thursday, December 11, 2008 9:47:00 AM  
Blogger Lilcee said...

ugh. Seriously annoyed at how packed TJ's is right now. No matter what time i'm there, there's always a crowd at the refreshment stand and they don't let you pass by. Get the F outta my way so I can pass through.

Oh and don't get me started on the lines. You'd think the area I live in there's about 4 TJ's in a 5 mile radius would be less packed. Heh.

Thursday, December 11, 2008 10:33:00 AM  
Blogger Jodi said...

Please tell me they sell mini pumpkin pies. Please. Even it's a lie. Please tell me.

Ha! LilSprinkles idea is funny. I'm never up that early unless it's a workday though. And then I'm already at work, so boo.

Thursday, December 11, 2008 12:48:00 PM  
Blogger Morgan said...

I like your version of the magic word better! haha

I think I'm going to have to go taste those. Yum!

Thursday, December 11, 2008 4:51:00 PM  
Blogger Keely said...

Oh dear, I almost peed my pants with what the Baby said. I hope Zoe & Finn are as cool as he is because he always makes me laugh. :)

Friday, December 12, 2008 10:16:00 AM  
Blogger Robin said...

Where does the Baby pick up these things?

Monday, December 15, 2008 7:16:00 AM  

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